#12853

1212

Jan. 18, 2024, 7:52 a.m.

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// Delaney is back after being gone for a couple days Ace: You know the saying “An apple a day keeps the doctor away?” Ace: I wonder if that also applies to Delaney. Delaney: My profile is listed as “Dr. Delaney, MD” because I live in Maryland. Delaney: One time I got a job offer as an anesthesiologist in Texas, with a starting salary of $550,000. Delaney: I really wanted to say “I’ll need at least 1 million before I move to Texas”.

#12859

1212

Jan. 18, 2024, 7:54 a.m.

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//Story about his grandfather Delaney: My grandfather accidentally cut the tendons in his hand with a chainsaw. Delaney: And my grandma obviously got really mad, saying something like “This really is one of the dumbest things you’ve done.” Delaney: She also told him to go to physical therapy. Delaney: He did, and I don’t see why he was so opposed to it. Going to PT for 6 weeks and getting to talk to all the pretty young ladies.

#12866

1212

Jan. 18, 2024, 11:37 a.m.

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Jerry Song: Andy Ying loves nuts Jerry: Me? I prefer balls.

#12892

1212

Jan. 24, 2024, 4:28 p.m.

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Schwartz: For the last Math Meet, I want to bring 60, 70 people. We should show up in force. Student: Is it to flex on Poolesville? Schwartz: No, it's for us! ... but it's also kinda to flex on Poolesville.

#13030

1212

Feb. 10, 2024, 11:17 a.m.

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O'Donovan: Can you guys not do anything dumb for 5 minutes? O'Donovan: I need to grab my coffee from the car or else I will go insane. Kian: Ok meng.

#13182

1212

March 12, 2024, 2:50 p.m.

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Eric: Why were the bells turned off today? Eric: Because Mrs. Johnson wanted to win a no-bell prize

#13188

1212

March 13, 2024, 11:34 a.m.

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Eric Shi: There’s Gerald Lu! Eric Shi: We’re gonna invade his ass

#13207

1212

March 15, 2024, 10:40 p.m.

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//on March 15 over the PA: the media center will be closed today for an event Schwartz: yeah, the stabbing of Caesar!

#13236

1212

March 22, 2024, 1:33 p.m.

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Hui: I saw Rose in 346 and he was on Blairbash. Hui: He immediately closed the tab and the next one open was Twitter.

#13244

1212

March 25, 2024, 9:42 a.m.

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Alan Sai: I'm gonna teach you how to order dimsum la Alan: so you point at what you want and you say "yat go" (一個) Alan: If you want more, you say "leung go (兩個)"，"sam go (三個)", etc. Alan: if they don't give you what you want you say "puk gai 仆街" (roughly meaning "[go] drop [dead] on a street") Alan: if you still don't give you what you want you say "HAM GA TSAN (冚家鏟)" (roughly meaning "death to your family")