#1352

88

Jan. 18, 2010, 9:21 p.m.

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Moose (reading from the Bible): ...it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle, than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God. Student: Is it hard for a camel to go through the eye of a needle?

#1351

44

Jan. 18, 2010, 8:05 p.m.

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Moose: Where do the bananas we buy come from? Student: Safeway!

#1350

44

Jan. 18, 2010, 2:20 p.m.

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Yordan: There is a Spanish saying, "Speak now or shut up forever."

#1349

1111

Jan. 18, 2010, 2:14 p.m.

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Yordan (to intercom): I want security down here! This kid is making a lot of sarcastic comments!

#1348

99

Jan. 18, 2010, 12:37 p.m.

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Schafer: I'm thinking of one more word. It starts with "fun" and ends with "mental." There's a "duh" in the middle.

#1347

13

Jan. 17, 2010, 10:33 p.m.

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//During the exam Whitacre: Okay, so the short answer questions and the essay prompt are gonna be up for 15 minutes, so write 'em down!  Then the visual will be up for the rest of the period. //a half hour after taking the questions down Student: What were the questions? Whitacre: I TOLD YOU TO WRITE 'EM DOWN!  I should fail you right now!

#1346

1616

Jan. 17, 2010, 6:20 p.m.

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Simel: So class, I learned something today. Students: What? Simel: I learned that pot sticks to you when it's cold. Don't smoke in the cold! I can tell, because we have a little CAP stoner in this room. I could have gotten high just walking in here.

#1345

46

Jan. 15, 2010, 9:31 p.m.

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Ryan W: Google and China are fighting a secret war.  In 5 years, only one of them's still going to be around.

#1344

33

Jan. 15, 2010, 9:12 p.m.

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Donaldson: What are you going to do if someone from 5th or 7th period asks you about the exam? Class: Say it was interesting Donaldson: No, you say, "Mr. Donaldson told us to tell you it was interesting" //proceeds to enact scenario

#1343

99

Jan. 15, 2010, 8:56 p.m.

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//student raises hand Rose: Is this a math question or a bear question? Student: Math question. Rose: Okay. What is it? Student: Why would bears actually follow a sinusoidal curve? Rose: That's a bear question.