#2741

1212

Jan. 3, 2011, 6:52 p.m.

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//Discussing The Metamorphosis in AP Lit Lisa: So they're throwing apples at a bug and suddenly decide to have sex‽ O'Connor: Multitasking!

#2745

1313

Jan. 4, 2011, 4:09 p.m.

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Thomas: Why do Leora and Julia have the same earmuffs? Eva: Because, in a ploy to actually make money, they made more than one.

#2752

66

Jan. 4, 2011, 9:47 p.m.

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//Schafer answers a student's question Student: Good point! Schafer: Thanks. I do try. You know, if I can make one good point per class per day, I might just continue to collect my paycheck.

#2760

33

Jan. 6, 2011, 9:44 p.m.

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Student: But isn't rubber not conductive? Schafer: Well, would you say rabbit fur was? Student: Well it sure was when I shocked that thing to death!

#2778

1212

Jan. 12, 2011, 7:42 p.m.

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Pham: So what answer you get? Theresa: D Pham: You sure? Theresa: Umm... I thought so. Pham: You sure it D? Or is that your grade?

#2779

1111

Jan. 12, 2011, 8:06 p.m.

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Freshman: Wait, how do girls get horny? They don't have an inerect horn to begin with, right?

#2791

1313

Jan. 16, 2011, 6:11 p.m.

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//during exam review Stelzner: Define assertation. Student: What? Stelzner: Oops, I mean assertion. Gah, guys, I can't read! Student: Would you pass this exam, Mr. Stelzner? Stelzner: I don't know, but I'm a teacher so it doesn't matter. So, define assertation. (pause) No, I did it again! Your English teacher can't read! Student: It's like we're in DC public schools!

#2792

66

Jan. 16, 2011, 6:12 p.m.

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//Stelzner is a huge Mets fan Student 1: What's alliteration? Stelzner: It's when you're repeating a consonant. You know, like, uhh, 'Sally sells seashells.' Student 2: That was terrible! Mr. Stelzner, you're the Mets of alliteration!

#2793

66

Jan. 17, 2011, 7:04 p.m.

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Ostrander: Research probably shows that the pajamas inside out thing doesn't really work, even when you wear them extra inside out.

#2794

1212

Jan. 18, 2011, 9:55 a.m.

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//At Science Bowl 2011 regional. RM kids sit down to watch Blair A vs. Blair C Pham: You got nothing better to do on holiday weekend? RM Girl: No, we got out. Pham: This the weekend! Why you have nothing better to do? Man, you guys are whole bunch of nerds.