#4210

3739

Sept. 20, 2012, 11:05 p.m.

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//Talking about his first year of college Whitacre: I went downtown every night. There were 54 bars to choose from, and I chose all of them.

#4458

3739

Feb. 26, 2013, 8:39 p.m.

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//Stat homework, explaining random vs. arbitrary selection; Matt shows a page that displays the numbers 1, 2, 3, 4 Matt: Sankar, pick one. Sankar: One. Matt: Why did you chose one? Sankar: You said pick one, so I picked "one". Matt: OK, pick another number. Sankar: One.

#5365

3739

Jan. 23, 2015, 10:52 p.m.

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//Block B, First day of Pham Chem Pham: This Montgomery County! They want to nail you to Harvard! They want to nail you to Yale! They want to nail you... to MIT! //awkward pause, students don't respond Pham: THEY WANT TO NAIL YOU!

#7867

3739

Jan. 17, 2019, 8:05 a.m.

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//Pd 2 sloe sophomore bio Sloe: So in hypertonic solution, the cell becomes all skinny like a hyperactive person... 6 different people at once: NOAM AVIV Sloe: well you all know who I'm talking about. Because I don't. //later Sloe: You gotta know'em to know Noam

#7873

3739

Jan. 17, 2019, 6:56 p.m.

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//marine bio presentation Loann: They're the chondr-- the chon-- //Duval is eating and talks in a muffled voice Duval: Chondrichthyes. Sorry, my mouth is full. Loann: Chondr-- sorry, my mouth is full.

#9476

3739

Dec. 2, 2021, 9:43 a.m.

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in adsa, talking about the urinal rule in mens bathrooms kyei: "diego wants to be a supervillian. diego literally wants to be a supervillian. i already know what diego would do. if there was 3 open urinals, diego would literally choose the middle one."

#5179

7583

Sept. 12, 2014, 12:29 a.m.

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// Yet another vegetarian joke Pham: Who here vegetarian? // Ramu raises his hand Pham: You know what soap made out of right? Whale fat. When you take shower, you rubbing meat all over your body. There no use be vegetarian.

#5318

119131

Dec. 15, 2014, 4:47 p.m.

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//Unnamed student (henceforth "Student") is giving a practice SRP presentation on people’s ability to distinguish between speaking and singing. //Student finishes presenting; more than half of the class raises their hand. Mike, to Matthew: Sorry, what’s everybody’s question? Matthew: Like, "what exactly did you do, again?" //Questions went on for half an hour. Below are some highlights. -- Harrison: So basically your project is about differentiating between speaking and singing. Do you have an objective definition of singing? Student: Singing is pleasing to the ears. Harrison: But do you have an objective definition? Student: No. Music is subjective. Harrison: Okay, so basically your project is meaningless. //Student calls on someone else. -- Arjuna: Doesn’t perception change with age? Student: Yeah, but age doesn’t really matter. Arjuna: So are you blocking by age? Student: Um... uh... yeah, sure. -- Eric: How many age blocks do you have? Student: Age doesn’t really matter. Eric: But are you blocking by age? Student: Uh, sure. Eric: So you have a sample size of 24, you have two gender blocks, and you have several age blocks. How will you be able to get statistically significant results? //Class laughs. Student: Well, after we have the data, we’ll figure out whether it’s statistically significant. Matthew: But Eric just figured out that it’s not statistically significant. Mike, to Matthew and Eric: Okay, we’ve determined that the whole project is BS. Let’s move on. //Student calls on the next person with a question. -- Sachin: Can you go back to the first slide? //Student goes back to the title slide. //5-second silence Student: So what’s your question? Sachin: Oh, I don’t have one. I just wanted you to go back to that slide. //Later Eric: Wait, why did you ask to go back to the first slide? Sachin: I just wanted to stall. Eric: So there wouldn’t be any more presentations? Sachin: Yeah, and to troll. -- Eric, to Mike: I think his project is not topologically equivalent to Salamano. //Note: Salamano, a character in _The Stranger_, is Eric’s go-to example of something that doesn’t have holes in it. Mike, to Eric: I think his project is topologically equivalent to a sponge. //After 5 seconds. Mike, to Eric: Actually, it’s topologically equivalent to a Sierpinski sponge, because it has no volume. Dennis, to Mike and Eric: If he did a math presentation, he would understand numbers better than anyone since Morris Kline. //Note: making fun of this ridiculous quote at the bottom of the front cover of this book: http://www.amazon.com/Mathematics-Loss-Certainty-Oxford-Paperbacks/dp/0195030850/ref=cm_rdp_product_img -- Ms. Bosse: Did anybody not ask a question yet? -- //This one might not be very accurate. //Kevin frantically waves his hand. Student calls on him. Kevin: You said during your presentation that audio evidence cannot be used in court, but I think that you can in fact use audio recordings in court. Student: Oh, by audio evidence I mean what people say they heard, not actual recordings. Kevin: But what if there’s hearsay? Student: What’s hearsay? //Kevin explains what hearsay is. Student: Oh, but I’m talking about actual recordings.

#3695

4347

Oct. 20, 2011, 5:18 p.m.

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Mr. Goldburg: Today we'll start off class with a surprise. Student: The quiz! Mr. Goldburg: Actually the surprise is that there ISN'T a quiz today! Students: What?! Mr. Goldburg: SIKE! I just re-suprised you. We will have a quiz today. Swag-daddy strikes again!

#8494

4347

Feb. 7, 2020, 3:11 p.m.

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// Looking at resistance in FOT Kaluta: Tell me you at least labeled the two resistors. Edward: Oh, we named them after their political ideologies. Kaluta: Somebody pull up Blair Bash- Do tell, what ideologies are they? Edward: This one’s liberal because all the stripes equally spread out and this one’s conservative because all the stripes are gathered at the top. Kaluta: My job gets harder everyday.