#10075

88

Feb. 24, 2022, 2:24 p.m.

⚐ Report

Schwartz: Our glass sprinkles in hydrochloric acid are perfectly mixed thanks to the efforts of our magic Stevens and Isaiahs. Schwartz: Our glass sprinkles are a meter across and our tank is 1 light year across. You might want to check at 2am to see if the Stevens and Isaiahs are swimming. Schwartz: Swimmers are crazy, you guys wake up at 5am to go swimming. I did lifeguarding and it was a big city pool so I woke up at 6am. Schwartz: And there were like 4 people doing laps. Schwartz: Go home, let me get paid for sleeping! Schwartz: In the past, I've had grass in blood, tanks in tanks, and the particulate matter was fish tanks. Stein does feces in water.

#10082

88

Feb. 24, 2022, 4:17 p.m.

⚐ Report

//yesterday //Kaluta has car battery, claims that 12V DC, being less than 40V, is safe, asks if anyone wants to try it Kaluta: You can hold your fingers down, even though you're getting shocked, and try to look like you're not, and we'll have to decide if you're getting shocked. Kaluta: Or you can act like you're being shocked, when you're not. We'll see how good an actor you are. //Will steps up, touches the battery briefly, falls backward onto floor Will: Aaahhh! The burn! Kaluta: "How did you break your butt? Well, I fell, when I DIDN'T get shocked." //today Kaluta: We know this battery is safe to touch. It's only twelve volts. //Kaluta repeatedly touches the battery, unharmed, and points at Will Will: You must have replaced it with a fake battery.

#10177

88

March 7, 2022, 8:24 a.m.

⚐ Report

Josh: Do the Eclipse devs have a grudge against someone named William? Josh: Am I high?

#10218

88

March 9, 2022, 3:45 p.m.

⚐ Report

Schwartz: It doesn’t matter what class they’re in, they will always work on something for another class.

#10241

88

March 10, 2022, 4:09 p.m.

⚐ Report

Schwartz: Here's how we make infinitely thin paint in math class: "assume you have infinitely thin paint." *ta-da gesture* Schwartz: Then we go back to math-land. //Entire class erupts in thunderous applause

#10242

88

March 10, 2022, 4:10 p.m.

⚐ Report

//after deriving that a particular sketchy integral equals 0 Schwartz: Celebrate, all you people -- all of you, except one -- who said this should be zero! Class: Yay! Schwartz: Stop celebrating, because you're wrong. Class: Oh no

#10254

88

March 14, 2022, 7:58 a.m.

⚐ Report

// Kyei is out, Contreras is subbing. About to play infoflow Contreras: so there's this this that I heard you guys don't do, which makes me sad Contreras: at the end of the intro, you gotta slam your desk as hard as you can along with the beat // Intro plays, some people do it Contreras: *pointing to back of room* he didn't do it, we gotta try again

#10315

88

March 21, 2022, 8:16 p.m.

⚐ Report

Lodal: "You guys should focus on my class, not some other dumb class!" Lodal two seconds later: "Feel free to put that on BlairBash." Lodal two seconds later: "Actually, don't. BlairBash ruins your mental health." Student in class: "My mental health is already ruined."

#10344

88

March 24, 2022, 1:30 p.m.

⚐ Report

Schwartz: Adults aren't magic. We don't know what we're doing either; we just know how to wing it better.

#10351

88

March 25, 2022, 3:10 p.m.

⚐ Report

Grace Ma: Maybe I'm just a degenerate Chinese person, but I like the intestines.